


Oh look at that, you found a Danganronpa chatfic. Congratulations :D

by cookedtoast



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: (except shuichis), Chatlogs, Chatting & Messaging, I Don't Even Know, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Shuichi gets possessed by r/cursedcomments, Texting, What Have I Done, Why Did I Write This?, i update when im bored lol, idk if what he says counts as 'graphic descriptions of violence', its only for chapter 2 and nobody actually gets hurt so you could just skip, kokichi is always trying to snatch everyones admin rights, kork just wants to do his spooky 3am rituals in peace, please let me know if it does and ill add it as a warning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:20:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,344
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24754633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cookedtoast/pseuds/cookedtoast
Summary: Uhh hello. I'm not sure how you got here but I hope you've been having fun in the depths of Ao3.I honestly have no clue why I made this. I just opened up word one day and would you look at that, a shitpost with over 1,000 words. So yeah, this is a danganronpa chatfic I write when I'm bored. Other characters from other dr games will probably show up eventually, so I'll add them to the character tags if/when they do.tfbygnub I have no idea where I'm going with this so welcome to the mess that is whatever this is :/
Relationships: Chabashira Tenko/Yumeno Himiko, Harukawa Maki/Momota Kaito, Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Comments: 17
Kudos: 67





	1. Chapter 1 - The ultimate mother refuses to re-own her son and admin rights are snatched

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huh someone actually clicked on a chapter of this.
> 
> Uhh hi :D
> 
> Welcome to the chaos that is this chatfic. Have fun and remember to stay hydrated.

_[15/02/20 – 21:36]_

  


**_Kaede Akamatsu_ ** _created group chat ‘Untitled’_

**_Kaede Akamatsu_ ** _added 15 people_

**Kaede Akamatsu:** Hi everyone :)

 **Kokichi Ouma:** owo whats this?

  


**_Maki Harukawa_ ** _removed **Kokichi Ouma**_

**_Shuichi Saihara_ ** _added **Kokichi Ouma**_

  


**Kaede Akamatsu:** Maki I will not hesitate to remove your admin rights and kokichi for the love of god.

 **Kokichi Ouma:** maki your so mean :((((((((( im gonna cRY :((((((((

 **Shuichi Saihara:** So is the whole class on this group?

 **Miu Iruma:** SUP DICKWADS

 **Korekiyo Shinguji:** Unfortunately, that seems to be the case.

 **Maki Harukawa:** Does she have to be here?

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** Oh come on guys, shes not that bad. Besides, it wouldn’t be a class chat without the entire class. So lets think positively about this! We can talk to the whole class at once much easier now.

 **Kaito Momota:** what would we need to talk about?

 **Kaito Momota:** also hello

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** I don’t know, like, homework and announcements stuff??

 **Kokichi Ouma:** boringggg. why would we talk about that when we could be doing something totally not boring and actually super fun!

 **Korekiyo Shinguji:** Your lack and misuse of punctuation sickens me.

 **Shuichi Saihara:** Kokichi, what are you proposing?

 **Kokichi Ouma:** marriage :)

 **Shuichi Saihara:** ??

 **Kokichi Ouma:** nishsishi! its a lie! :))

 **Shuichi Saihara:** Just answer the question

 **Kokichi Ouma:** fineee.

 **Kokichi Ouma:** first of all your usernames are all boring and suck so we need to change that!

 **Korekiyo Shinguji:** Please, I am begging you to learn what a comma and capital letter is. I will send you back to pre-school if I must.

 **Kokichi Ouma:** you say that as if I ever went to pre-school in the first place

 **Shuichi Saihara:** You didn’t?

 **Kokichi Ouma:** nope!! :D i was too busy doing crime

 **Tenko Chabashira:** imagine a toddler kokichi trying wreck havoc

 **Himiko Yumeno:** that sounds terrifying.

 **Maki Harukawa:** Toddlers are already annoying, don’t make them worse.

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** I thought your whole talent was looking after them??

 **Kokichi Ouma:** anywayy!! lets get back to what we were doing before i was rudely interrupted by tenko

  


**_Kokichi Ouma_ ** _changed **Tenko Chabashiras** name to **Rude and Sapphic**_

****

**Gonta Gokuhara:** gonta not know what sapphic mean??

 **Rude and Sapphic:** I mean its half true.

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** It means woman loving woman

  


**_Kaito Momota_ ** _changed **Maki Harukawas** name to **Maki Roll**_

  


**Kaito Momota:** :)

  


**_Maki Roll_ ** _changed their name to **Do you wanna die?**_

  


**Kaito Momota:** :(

 **Do you wanna die?:** …

  


**_Do you wanna die?_ ** _changed their name to **Maki Roll**_

  


**Kaito Momota:** :)

 **Kokichi Ouma:** awwww thats so cute owo im gonna cry again :_33

 **Kaito Momota:** shut up before she changes it back

 **Kokichi Ouma:** :((((

  


**_Kokichi Ouma_ ** _changed **Shuichi Saiharas** name to **Shumai**_

**Shumai:** …

 **Kokichi Ouma:** :)))

 **Shumai:** You know what, I expected worse so I’ll take it.

  


**_Himiko Yumeno_ ** _changed **Rude and Sapphics** name to **Sapphic and will fight you**_

**Sapphic and will fight you:** shes right you better watch out degenerate males :)

  


**_Sapphic and will fight you_ ** _changed **Himiko Yumenos** name to **Magical Lesbian**_

**Magical Lesbian:** thank

 **Shumai:** dont you mean thanks?

 **Magical Lesbian:** i couldnt be bothered to type the s

 **Sapphic and will fight you:** mood

**_Kirumi Tojo_ ** _changed their name to **Ultimate Maid**_

**Kokichi Ouma:** ughhhhhhhhhh boringgggg

 **Magical Lesbian:** hush you sound like that that scary long haired boy from gundams class

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** you know gundam?

 **Magical Lesbian:** ye we practice magic together

 **Magical Lesbian:** also his hamsters are cute

  


**_Magical Lesbian_ ** _sent image ‘gundamnshamsters.png’_

**Gonta Gokuharu:** even though they not bugs they are still beautiful :)

 **Kaito Momota:** I agree

 **Sapphic and will fight you:** They’re adorable Himiko! :D

  


**_Kokichi Ouma_ ** _changed **Ultimate Maids** name to **Ultimate Mother**_

**Ultimate Mother:** I’m not your mother.

 **Magical Lesbian:** :(

 **Ultimate Mother:** I meant Kokichi’s mother.

 **Kokichi Ouma:** :(((((( woww. your all going to make me cry a third time??? i thought you were all supposed to be nice

 **Shumai:** Didn’t you claim to cry the second time literally because Maki and Kaito were being nice to eachother??

 **Kokichi Ouma:** hush shuichi this isnt about them

 **Angie Yonaga:** Greetings! What is this? :)

  


**_Kokichi Ouma_ ** _changed **Angie Yonagas** name to **Atua is watching**_

****

**Shumai:** A class group chat where Kokichi has admin rights.

 **Kokichi Ouma:** fear my powerrr >:)

 **Atua is watching:** I have no reason to feel fear, for I have Atua :)

  


**_Kokichi Ouma_ ** _removed admin rights from 14 people_

**Shumai:** vybugbvtf oh shit.

 **Kaito Momota:** I think we have a reason to fear.

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** Kokichi wtf give us back our admin rights >:/

 **Ultimate Mother:** Correct me if I’m wrong, but I recall this class has a total of 16 students. Kokichi only removed admin rights from 14 people?

 **Sapphic and will fight you:** WAIT WHO STILL HAS ADMIN RIGHTS

 **Magical Lesbian:** please give them back to us. I refuse to let this man have any power over me.

 **Shumai:** …

 **Kokichi Ouma:** shuichi please ;-;

 **Shumai:** Can I at least give back Kaedes admin rights since she’s the class rep?

 **Kokichi Ouma:** ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh fineeeeeee

  


**_Shumai_ ** _gave admin rights to **Kaede Akamatsu**_

****

**Kaede Akamatsu:** Thanks Shuichi :)

 **Magical Lesbian:** kaede

 **Magical Lesbian:** please

 **Magical Lesbian:** ;-;

  


  


**_Kaede Akumatsu_ ** _gave admin rights to **Ultimate Mother**_

****

**Magical Lesbian:** wth

 **Ultimate Mother:** Thank you, Kaede.

 **Magical Lesbian:** this is b e t r a y a l

 **Sapphic and will fight you:** how dare you betray her >:/

 **Magical Lesbian:** I trusted you

 **Magical Lesbian:** this is homophobic

 **Kokichi Ouma:** wait wtf stop giving people admin rights

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** 1) Kokichi this is our mother obviously she should have admin rights 2) Himiko I’m literally bi??

 **Magical Lesbian:** you got me there

 **Kokichi Ouma:** ??! Kirumis undisowning me???? :_D

 **Korekiyo shinguji:** _‘undisowning’_

 **Ultimate mother:** No.

 **Kokichi Ouma:** :(

 **Shumai:** Bi ahoge gang

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** Bi ahoge gang

 **Kokichi Ouma:** tbuyniytnuyi just stop throwing around admin rights >:/

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** I literally only gave rights to one person?

 **Kokichi Ouma:** hush you untuned instrument

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** >:O

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** Rude.

 **Shumai:** What does that even mean??

 **Kokichi Ouma:** ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 **Ultimate Mother:** It is 10:00pm so I suggest all of you go to sleep.

 **Kokichi Ouma:** whatttt???? thats way too early >:(

 **Atua is watching:** Atua suggests you listen to mother, Kokichi.

 **Kokichi Ouma:** !! i knew it you are undisowning me!! :D

 **Ultimate Mother:** Just go to sleep.

 **Kokichi Ouma:** you aren’t denying it :)))

 **Maki Roll:** If you don’t shut up right this instant I’m going to go over to your dorm and help you with it you filthy grape.

 **Kokichi Ouma:** :(

 **Kaede Akamatsu:** Go to sleep

 **Kaito Momota:** go to sleep

 **Atua is watching:** Go to sleep.

 **Korekiyo Shinguji:** Go to sleep.

 **Sapphic and will fight you:** go to sleep degenerate

 **Kokichi Ouma:** no >:/

 **Magical Lesbian:** go to sleep

 **Ultimate Mother:** Go to sleep.

 **Shumai:** Go to sleep

 **Kokichi Ouma:** yfgyftydvtb finee :(((

 **Kokichi Ouma:** but i do not wish any of you a good night

 **Shumai:** :(

 **Kokichi Ouma:** it’s a lie! :))

 **Kokichi Ouma:** good night my underlings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will put names at the end of each chapter :)
> 
> Kokichi Ouma: Kokichi Ouma  
> Shuichi Saihara: Shumai  
> Rantaro Amami: Rantaro Amami  
> Korekiyo Shunguji: Korekiyo Shinguji  
> Gonta Gokuhara: Gonta Gokuhara  
> Kaede Akamatsu: Kaede Akamatsu  
> Tsumugi Shirogane: Tsumugi Shirogane  
> Maki Harukawa: Maki Roll  
> Ryoma Hoshi: Ryoma Hoshi  
> Miu Iruma: Miu Iruma  
> Himiko Yumeno: Magical Lesbian  
> Kirumi Tojo: Ultimate Mother  
> Kaito Momota: Kaito Momota  
> Tenko Chabashira: Sapphic and will fight you  
> K1-B0: K1-B0  
> Angie Yonaga: Atua is watching


	2. Chapter 2 - Shuichi Saihara gets possessed by r/cursedcomments at 3am *GONE WRONG* *NOT CLICKBAIT*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh damn. 117 hits. Regyfdfv I didnt expect this thanks hhhh. 
> 
> Also, I changed the month in this to February, so that everyone still has classes. 
> 
> Wow, remember when this fanfiction wasnt cursed?

_[15/02/20 – 3:21]_

**Rantaro Amami:** uhhh wtf is this

 **Kokichi Ouma:** uhhh why tf are you awake

**_Rantaro Amami_ ** _sent image ‘unoreversecard.png’_

**Kokichi Ouma:** you fool, I do not need sleep, for I have ascended the needs of slumberation

 **Rantaro Amami:** fair

 **Shumai:** slumberation isn’t a word

 **Rantaro Amami:** thuitgyuh shuichi why are you still awake go to sleep

 **Kokichi Ouma:** hush avocado pip

 **Kokichi Ouma:** you hardly ever sleep

 **Shumai:** haha

**_Shumai_ ** _changed **Rantaro Amamis** name to **Avocado Pip**_

**Avocado Pip:** you said youd go to sleep >:/

**_Shumai_ ** _changed their name to **haha no**_

****

**Avocado Pip:** fygnubuyguh gO TO SLEEP

 **Kokichi Ouma:** I agree with shuichi whats even the point of sleep

 **Avocado Pip:** kokichi no

 **Avocado Pip:** he needs to go to sleep before his brain gets all wonky

 **Kokichi Ouma:** wonky??

 **haha no:** what if you could peel peoples skin like a banana

 **Kokichi Ouma:** …

 **Kokichi Ouma:** oh

 **Avocado Pip:** welp were too late.

 **Avocado Pip:** welcome to Shuichi Saihara: cursed 3am thoughts edition

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** nice

 **Koichi Ouma:** :O we summoned the beanie from his cave

 **Avocado Pip:** ryoma run

 **haha no:** but what if

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** should I be afraid of whatever hes talking about

 **Avocado Pip:** absolutely.

 **haha no:** would people die as their insides slop onto the floor? Or with time and evolution would we develop some kind of new skin layer underneath to protect us?

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** well then

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** thanks for the new sleep paralysis demon

 **Kokichi Ouma:** cursed shuichi is truly asking the real questions

 **Kokichi Ouma:** I think I like this version of him

 **Avocado Pip:** well your both stuck with him now :) good luck with the survival of your sanity :))

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** bold of you to assume I have sanity in the first place

 **Avocado Pip:** ok mood

 **haha no:** were all technically living water balloons

 **Kokichi Ouma:** elaborate

 **Avocado Pip:** please don’t.

 **haha no:** blood is the water and skin is the balloon

**Ryoma Hoshi:** <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6n3pFFPSlW4>

**Avocado Pip:** … did you literally just send shuichi a video on how to delete his account?

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** can you really blame me

 **Avocado Pip:** honestly no

 **Kokichi Ouma:** wow :(( I cant believe youd bully shumai like this :((((

 **Avocado Pip:** hush you unmoisturised grape skin

**_Shumai_ ** _changed **Kokichi Oumas** name to **Unmoisturised Grape Skin**_

****

**Avocado Pip:** rFYRGTYFYtyfr

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** damn

 **Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** shuichi wHY ;-;

 **Avocado Pip:** I take back everything I said

 **Avocado Pip:** this is my favourite version of shuichi

 **Unmoisturied Grape Skin:** I TRUSTED YOU ;-;;;

 **haha no:** can you fertilize limbs?

 **Avocado Pip:** never mind.

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** what do you mean c a n y o u f e r t i l i z e l i m b s ?

 **haha no:** I wonder if they would have a different taste to regular limbs

 **Avocado Pip:** w h a t t h e f u c k

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** wow somehow he made it worse

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** congratulations: I can never sleep again

 **Avocado Pip:** why the fuck would you want to know what a limb tastes like???

 **Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** idk ask that one person who commissioned angie

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** please throw your phone off a bridge and never talk to me again.

 **Avocado Pip:** we do not speak of that cursed event in this christian server.

 **Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** wow how could you say such a horrible thing to my poor innocent phone

 **Korekiyo Shinguji:** Would all of you kindly stop using this group chat at 3am. I cannot properly perform a ritual with the sounds of my phone notifications going off every five seconds and it’s best for you to all be asleep, or at least off your devices at this hour anyway.

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** rituals...?

 **Korekiyo Shinguji:** Correct. When I have trouble falling asleep, I tend to make use of my time by attempting to sense (and in some special cases, contact) wandering spirits. The issue is that the rituals I perform require silence, other than a passage I must read aloud. I cannot obtain this goal if you do not oblige to the previous request.

 **Avocado Pip:** spooky ghost ritual at 3am *GONE WRONG* *NOT CLICKBAIT*

**_haha no_ ** _changed **Korekiyo Shingujis** name to **Correct. When I have trouble falling asleep, I tend to make use of my time by attempting to sense (and in some special cases, contact) wandering spirits. The issue is that the rituals I perform require silen**_

****

**Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** interesting choice

 **Avocado Pip:** can usernames even be that long??

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** apparently. He probably reached the character limit.

 **Correct. When I have trouble falling asleep, I tend to make use of my time by attempting to sense (and in some special cases, contact) wandering spirits. The issue is that the rituals I perform require silen:** Why has my username been changed to something so long and obnoxious? If somebody could change it back, I would appreciate it.

 **Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** how dare you insult such a beautiful name >:(

 **Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** personally, I think its glorious.

 **Correct. When I have trouble falling asleep, I tend to make use of my time by attempting to sense (and in some special cases, contact) wandering spirits. The issue is that the rituals I perform require silen:** I see you have finally used a comma in one of your god forsaken texts. Congratulations, but could you please change my name?

 **haha no:** ryguhghyugrfygbgrrefgtrdf

 **Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** wow shuichi, that was so moving and inspirational. I totally agree.

**_haha no_ ** _changed **Correct. When I have trouble falling asleep, I tend to make use of my time by attempting to sense (and in some special cases, contact) wandering spirits. The issue is that the rituals I perform require silens** name to **efygruhgnutvrh**_

****

**Avocado Pip:** is shuichi okay? I cant tell if his phones glitching or if hes just gone insane.

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** haven’t we all

 **Avocado Pip:** mood

 **efygruhgnutvrh:** At least it’s short.

 **efygruhgnutvrh:** Now, if you could kindly stop interrupting my ritual, I will be on my way.

 **haha no:** e

 **efygruhgnutvrh:** E?

 **Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** e

 **Avocado Pip:** e

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** e

 **efygruhgnutvrh:** I don’t believe continuing to send messages to this group chat was my request.

 **Avocado Pip:** you could just turn off notifications?

 **efygruhgnutvrh:** You could just abide by a healthy sleep schedule?

 **Avocado Pip:** damn

**_Avocado Pip_ ** _sent image ‘yougotmetherememe.png’_

**Ultimate Mother:** I am going to count down five seconds.

 **Avocado Pip:** oh frik I think we angered mother

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** guess ill die

 **Ultimate Mother:** 5

 **Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** DD: please im your son

 **Avocado Pip:** press f to pay respects

 **Ultimate Mother:** 4

 **Ryoma Hoshi:** f

 **Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** f

 **Avocado Pip:** f

 **Ultimate Mother:** 3

 **Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** :(((((( please mother I cant believe youd murder your innocent children like this

 **Ultimate Mother:** 2

 **Avocado Pip:** dytfghftdvyrfg yEET

**_Avocado Pip_ ** _has gone offline_

**Ryoma Hoshi:** yeet

**_Ryoma Hoshi_ ** _has gone offline_

**Ultimate Mother:** 1

 **haha no:** yeet

**_haha no_ ** _has gone offline_

**Unmoisturised Grape Skin:** yeet

**_Unmoisturised Grape Skin_ ** _has gone offline_

**efygruhgnutvrh:** Thank you, Kirumi.

 **Ultimate Mother:** Your welcome.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kokichi Ouma: Unmoisturised Grape Skin  
> Shuichi Saihara: haha no  
> Rantaro Amami: Avocado Pip  
> Korekiyo Shunguji: efygruhgnutvrh  
> Gonta Gokuhara: Gonta Gokuhara  
> Kaede Akamatsu: Kaede Akamatsu  
> Tsumugi Shirogane: Tsumugi Shirogane  
> Maki Harukawa: Maki Roll  
> Ryoma Hoshi: Ryoma Hoshi  
> Miu Iruma: Miu Iruma  
> Himiko Yumeno: Magical Lesbian  
> Kirumi Tojo: Ultimate Mother  
> Kaito Momota: Kaito Momota  
> Tenko Chabashira: Sapphic and will fight you  
> K1-B0: K1-B0  
> Angie Yonaga: Atua is watching
> 
> If I made any mistakes here, please let me know.  
> (Also, I'm sorry if you clicked the youtube link, I'm pretty sure that meme died ages ago oof)


End file.
